#that to me and then go on to harass two trans men and try to disprove their racial backgrounds you can do that!

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

I wasn't about to say anything to this annoying little bitch because they're 18 but when I tell you that aro/aces in this fandom are literally trying to police people for merely being attracted to Alastor now like??? This is why I'll keep on saying that some of you (aro/aces) are insufferable as shit and need to shut the fuck up?

Or how 'bout

Or how 'bout if Alastor respected Vaggie and hadn't sexually harassed her by way of chin tickling and arse slapping, I wouldn't in turn look at him disrespectfully and want to give him a taste of his own touchy feely medicine?

How 'bout fans can do and feel whatever they want about Alastor cause he's not real and how 'bout everyone should stop treating fictional characters like they're real when they're not real? Including goddamn fucking Valentino...

How 'bout another reminder to stop clogging the actual queer and ace tags on tumblr that real ace people might be using to find real community and resources, with posts about a goddamn fucking ~"tumblr sexy man"~ fictional serial killer cannibal because I'm sure that real aspec people trying to look for real resources in real life are sick of all the goddamn fucking fiction by now???

How 'bout "You can write about a characters sexuality/fucking/getting fucked, but you're not allowed to explore or acknowledge any sexual attraction to them while you're writing about them being sexual and having sex, which would inherently require taking sexual attraction into consideration in order to even do that, but you're not allowed to, because that's disrespectful!" is officially the most bullshit moronic take I've ever heard...

[flagellant]

Hello, tumblr! I mentioned this in my stream last night with my friend and collaborator @lakemojave, but here is the official tumblr announcement: I've started a fundraiser to pay for GAS that I can't afford on my own.

I...try my best to appear pretty unflappable on this site, because my online persona relies on that. But about two years ago I was harassed by TE/RFs and no matter how much I tried to forget or get over it, there was a comment that a 17 year old made towards my appearance the has probably been the most devastating thing I've ever felt, and ever since that insult I've grown steadily and steadily more disgusted and anxious about my appearance--specifically my hair.

As an AMAB trans person, I'm of course going to experience male-pattern baldness. Even in cisgender men, more than 75% of them experience some form of heightened anxiety and dysphoria due to hair loss or fear of it. I don't know how those numbers change when talking about trans people, but I can't imagine it's not even higher.

In the interest of full transparency at the cost of, frankly, my pride: I have reached the point in my dysphoria where I am growing to be borderline suicidal. I've struggled with suicidal ideation since I was a young teenager, but this is the first time in over a decade that I've reached a level where I am terrified what will happen when it gets worse.

And so with all that said, I've started a fundraiser on PayPal to try and raise money for my gender-affirming care. Y'all might remember me from the Great Soy Sauce Conspiracy of late December of last year, and maybe also how I stopped working on the project due to mental health reasons. I remember how kind all of you were when I was struggling with living newly on my own trying to afford food and things like convection plates, and it's my hope that I could rely on you all to help me again.

With that said, I've made the decision that if I am able to fulfill this fundraiser's cost...I'm going to pick back up The Mysterious Appearance of Miss Appleton and finally finish it once and for all...in video essay format, because that feels most appropriate to me. I think I'm going to be ready for it this time.

If you've read this far, thank you so much. If you need it, though:

TLDR: I need to get myself gender-affirming surgery because i'm getting real close to suicidal over my dysphoria. I've made a fundraiser for it. If the fundraiser is successful, I'm going to finally finish the video essay for The Mysterious Appearance Of Miss Appleton. Thank you for your time and your help.

[camomileapplesyrup]

today i got into a heated argument with two TRAs over the twoXchromosomes subreddit. i made a post about the woman-centric subreddit now being overrun with men & MRAs who harass women that share their traumatic experiences with men. from SA, to spousal abuse, women found a space where they felt safe discussing their experiences in life.

posts expressing feminist thought, traumatic experiences & general fear of men were met with downvote bombings & harassment.

men pretend to be underage girls pretending not to understand masturbation and acting they don't know how to wash "down there", asking for advice for sexual gratification of course.

men CONSTANTLY adding their two cents to posts that absolutely do not need it.

the subreddit is now uncomfortable & stifling, mods do absolutely nothing about it. so i made a lengthy post and so many women responded. over 500 comments of women responding positively, and thanking me for calling out an ongoing issue.

well, apparently i am transphobic and i am acting "sussy" with saying; “every time i come here and a woman makes a post with the most MINUSCULE feminist intent, or sharing her trauma, or difficulties in her personal experiences, it doesn't just get downvoted to oblivion, but filled up with comments of dudes adding their two cents, tone policing, making sexual & or fetish comments or "not all men"ing her. this is a woman centric community. two X chromosomes. we aren't going to make our tones softer, be gentler and tip-toe around our individual experiences to make YOU, a dude, comfortable.”

all it took was this for two TRAs to gang up on me & call me transphobic. saying this is why they don't trust cis feminists, and patronising me with expressions like "you must be so brave for calling yourself a radfem". they claimed that i cannot call myself a radical feminist because it's just bigoted towards trans women, despite me living in a 3rd world country where we don't even have working woman's shelters and proper laws against spousal abuse. "im sorry your life is hard as a woman living in a misogynistic country, but that is here nor there with regard to the terminology we're discussing" i'm sorry, what?

most of us aren't privileged enough to be libfems. i wish pink fucking girlboss they/she queen xenogender discourse was what my country could be doing, but life is not fair for everyone. if a woman here gets abused, stalked, or raped, she has nowhere to go. no phone number to call. no police to call. no prosecutor to trust in. and i went through this, personally.

by the end i had to block them, because they were derailing the conversation. but fuck, even when i literally do my best and try to be inclusive to everyone, i get spat in the fucking face.

[velvetvexations]

I’m. So baffled by that one dude saying that trans men being able to pretend to be women is a privilege, because in his tags he says that it’s a thing specific to transmascs. Does he mean pretending to be cis as a means of safety is a transmasc specific thing?? Because uh, I’m… pretty sure that’s something that can be done regardless of a trans person’s gender? There are transfems and nonbinary people who can also pretend to be cis [whatever their agab was], too?

Its also not a privilege. Having to hide what you are out of fear isn’t a fucking privilege lmao

strangely people understand that when it's about trans women

just saw a post on my dash saying "'infighting' is a dogwhistle which frames transfems as aggressors". i really hope the tide is turning like you said, bc this shit is getting exhausting and im still seeing it from random people i follow who otherwise gave no indication that they drank the koolaid.

they make me out to be the aggressor all the time!

Nazi imagery anon here

These are the pics I was referring to.

As you can see it’s posted on the verified border security account and you can see two different nazi symbols on him :(

yeah it looks like standards for what they allow soldiers to adorn themselves with are low and the person taking and posting the pics aren't paying good enough attention because that guy also straight up has a naked anime bitch on his knife sheath

as I said this is an individual thing and they need to start knocking their heads together like the Three Stooges and sending them into trenches first

You know who saying that th**fab is actually a storied term that trans fems have been using to identify transmisogonists is fucking insane like girl that's such obvious lie give us nothing

they aren't even trying

It’s crazy how almost every other day on this site I see a new post with like 50k notes talking about how absolutely NOBODY deserves to be harassed, sent death threats or be put on blast yet once again I’m seeing people trying to justify the harassment of another transmasc teenager. Honestly people should just start openly admitting Tumblr is becoming increasingly hostile towards trans masculine individuals, I don’t see clownery on this level on any other platform-

Tumblr...is really bad.

I think the reason why this whole headcanons discourse bothers me so much is that is really is just fuelled by petty spite. Like all these characters are cisgender in canon. We make headcanons because it’s FUN to expand on characters in ways that reflect our different life experiences in whatever form that may take. Intentionally going after transmascs, especially young transmascs, for doing this with characters like they like and accusing them of all these different things genuinely does just feel like bigotry. Who cares if a head canon may not make the most amount of sense? It’s a cisgender fictional character we’re playing around with! Why does it have to be some grand act of activism to say blorbo number 3 is transmasc? We have much bigger fish to fry here.

exactly it's such dedication to not letting anyone else have anything

So sick of people acting like trans men are the same as cis men under the patriarchy and moreso im really sick of the "you're privileged to not be surrounded by men". Like, for lack of better phrasing, saying that about a group of people that is generally perceived as "failure women" pre transition (and sometimes during and post) is a little tone deaf. All about acknowledging how women and people perceived as women are harmed by misogyny until the ones perceived are men. Gender essentialism is ugly and tasteless and nonsensical. Please feel free to delete this im just rambling without a point

rambling is okay anon <3

„wow ur so privileged to not fear men”

i fear the fucking everyone asshole, i just realized that isnt everyone elses fault so i should still treat them with respect !!!!!

that woman called me a "self-hating doll" and I hate the second part a lot more than the first

[hillbillyoracle]

So I saw this screencap earlier

And I thought it was a great chance to talk about something.

A lot of progressive folks are familiar with the fact that right wing circles use feminine as a derogatory term and that there's a real cost to that for women.

What people are less familiar with is how it hurts men - queer and straight, cis and trans.

And I'm not shocked given how common it is in left leaning spaces to be reactionary (read: dismissive or outright harass) when men try to talk about these what these issues look like for them.

When men talk about how they've experienced toxic masculinity and anti-feminine bias, in addition to the usual right wing responses, I'm starting to see a bunch of supposed feminists and trans/queer allies harass them as well - saying they're hurting women/feminine presenting folks by "centering men", dismissing their concerns as made up (even when there's research to back it up), "why aren't you talking about what this is like for cis and trans women instead??".

I've seen trans men accused of being TERFs or being liars (by other trans people even - wtf) when they talk about their experiences of allies actively excluding them from trans spaces or harassing them for using T4T tags. I've seen men be accused of lying about publicly accessible clinical research that shows men make up 75%-77% of suicide cases - or worse suggest they deserve it. I see posts about how men's complaints "aren't unique to them" and dismiss them because women also suffer things those authors assume are the same (even when the research contradicts this).

And here's the thing:

When you assume feminine=good/safe/gentle and masculine=bad/unsafe/enemy - you're parroting a conservative talking point.

There is no way around this fact.

A big part of what underpins child rearing being "the woman's domain" in conservatism, is the idea that men are inherently dangerous and therefore shouldn't really be around children without women present.

The reason why they blame women for abuse and rape - because they believe men are inherently dangerous and if a woman trusted them then it's her fault.

Part of why women have been effectively banned from many trades and careers for so long is the assumption that being around that many men presents an inherent danger to a woman.

"But!" you might be saying, "This person is clearly talking about men engaging in open conflict as good here!"

Yeah because conservatives see politics as an inherently male/dangerous/toxic sphere and uphold it as such.

I could go on and on really.

All of this is to say - please be more thoughtful in what you consume, comment, and reblog.

There are experiences specific to being masculine. Erasing that is one, a dick move, but two, particularly violent toward those talking about trans masculine, minority masculine, disabled masculine, and queer masculine experiences.

All privilege comes at a cost. Listening when people talk about that cost is key building a new more fair reality. Seeing the privilege is not worth the cost makes fervent allies. Want more allies? Don't be a dick to people having that realization.

Push back against the assumption of woman=good and man=bad when you see it - especially in community spaces. The amount of times I've seen domestic violence services only available to women is insane...

Do not let identarian politics blind you to the fact we're all human and working toward our own liberation should not come at the oppression of another. Believe me, those with real power would much rather you stay raging out at men in a similar class with you than directing your efforts at them.

The right wing wants you to believe it's either/or. Fuck that - it's both/and.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for using the only accessible restroom at the office, when I don't technically need to?

I am a trans person in my twenties who is neurologically & physically disabled. My disabilities are (mostly) invisible and I do not have any mobility aids or bulky access devices, nor do I have any toileting-related disabilities. This is relevant.

In the large office building where I work, each storey has: A women's room with no large accessible stall; a men's room with no large accessible stall; and a single-occupancy all-genders large accessible restroom.

I am visibly trans, regardless of how I dress or whether I wear a mask. I have been verbally harassed in both the women's room and the men's room, and security has been called on me once. HR told me to use the single-occupancy restroom to avoid further "conflicts." However, two of my coworkers on this floor have bulky mobility aids, so they cannot fit into the stalls of the men's room or women's room. Yesterday, one of them ("Pat") was in the lobby waiting for me to exit the single-occupancy restroom so they could use it. When Pat saw that I exited, not our other coworker with a mobility aid, they started to berate me for making them wait on someone who is not disabled. They insisted I use the women's room, and I was too upset to respond, I just walked away.

I don't want to go to HR again, who I think see me as the problem, rather than the bathroom layout being the problem. I don't want to be harassed in a gendered restroom again, but I feel terrible for making Pat wait on the only restroom they can physically access. I don't want to tell Pat and my other coworker with a mobility aid why I use that restroom, because I am afraid they will not be sympathetic to my reasons, since they cannot physically use the other restrooms and I physically can (just at significant risk of harassment and HR complaint).

I already try not to use any restroom at work, since it is causing so many problems with my coworkers. I work on an upper floor, and my badge only lets me into the floor where I work and the ground floor lobby, so I can't get to a different block of restrooms in a reasonable amount of time. My job has good benefits and is not too difficult, so quitting my job over the restroom situation feels extreme. I am trying to be considerate of all of my coworkers, but I am afraid that I am in the wrong anyway.

Would I be the asshole if I keep using the single-occupancy accessible restroom when I need to go?

I'm sorry if this sounds like bait. I am afraid of giving too much detail about where I work. If the mod wants more information I might be able to provide floor plans for my office without compromising my privacy?

What are these acronyms?

[orangetonavy]

about I Saw the TV Glow...

i love movies and some of my favs are Titane, After Yang, Dogville, so and so. you get the gist. so at first i didn't really like the movie. i kinda get why the dialogues were so deadpan and the colours of the lighting were so strong ofc but i didn't inherently love it. the theme too, i was cis while watching it and for some scenes i could definitely feel it but overall it wasn't for me. the progression of the plot felt a little undercooked and all. i finished the movie and thought: hm. i get why all those trans people love it and it did make me feel some kind of ache at times. well. time to go to sleep.

like two days later, i kid you not, i realized that i wasn't cis. there was just this pang in my heart. a distant voice telling me that i still have time. time for what? i thought. i know i don't like my life but i've always liked being cis. i like being a girl. i love being a lesbian. i still do, but i was wrong. i was trying to make myself believe that i was content with being a woman.

now keep in mind that i live in asia. in my country women traditionally aren't allowed to look much masculine at all. no fat, no muscles, pale skin, long hair, tight but modest clothes, sweet voice, never angry. and because i fought my way through life to have relatively shorter, shaggy, dyed hair, a loud rough voice to get angry at older men for swearing at me on the bus and to love my body with all my muscles and layer of fat, i thought i already renovated myself. everything i did was eventually feminine because i am female.

but i am not feminine. thinking that i was a female by heart made me act in ways that would often confine me to femininity. i'd try to enjoy flaunting my body even after being sexually harassed for it my entire life ever since my breasts started to grow. sometimes i felt like i was useful whenever my body would get ogled at because that's how i learned to cope. i slowly got disinterested in sex and sexuality after an sa.

now that i take t and label myself as trans, i feel liberated. i don't have to cope with the shame and anger my body has given me my whole life anymore. i can be myself and i can tell people who i am in a way they would understand my own view on myself. my interest in sex and love and people are back. i'm unafraid of eventually becoming *the girl* in a relationship with a man because i am not a girl, and i'd meet someone who respects that someday.

there really is still time. i can't wait to be 30, 40, maybe i'd have a flat hairy chest by then. or maybe not and i come to peace with my guy tits. could be single but i doubt that bc i'd be hot lol. might be in a lesbian relationship. might have a husband. might be married to a spouse without gender or whatever. doesn't matter. i'll be loving myself and my partner. there is still so much time.

[drdemonprince]

most of my experience with the idea of transandrophobia or any specific hate towards trans men mostly came from a lot of the harm the “irreversible damage” book did to me as a teen and the harassment i saw a lot of transmasc youtubers go through. i don’t know if maybe i was just in a particular place on the internet where that was much more relevant but i think that rooted a lot of, idk, paranoia? in me? i’ve never compared my oppression to transmisogyny or believed that trans men were more harmed than trans women in any way, it’s always been like a next to but separate concept in my head, i suppose

So first let me say that Irreversible Damage and its ilk are HORRIBLE and the detrans TERF movement so thoroughly fucked me up. SO much. See my piece "My Dalliance with Detransition" for more on that.

I do not think that's transmisandry though. It's transphobia. And an attempt to recruit transmascs into the TERF detrans cult. They use corrective therapy tactics. (The group Health Liberation Now does a great deal to blow the whistle on this).

It's the same as ex-gay shit. That isn't misandry either. It's homophobia. I think people discount how bad homophobia and transphobia can be? People need it to be this special gendered locus of oppression these days. But those two things just really are that horrible. It's traumatic and manipulative. And they try to recruit us to use us as a cudgel against trans femmes. Doesn't mean we don't have it hard. But wanting to make us compliant footsoldiers is different from what they want of trans women, which is eradication.

[redditreceipts]

so do you nitpick and only acknowledge stuff that makes trans people look bad or are you open to screenshots showing the reality of how terfs act as well?

yes, of course! you can just send them to me :)

you'd just have to take three things into account:

the people in the screenshots have to be actual feminists. People like Posie Parker, who has said that she is not a feminist on numerous occasions, are not "TERFs"

the screenshots have to have at least some support from the community. If you look at the stuff I post, you'll see that I try to include upvotes and comments to show that this is not some fringe opinion, but is actually an opinion shared by a large part of the community. if the posts on your screenshots have one like and two views, it's not something that I'll be interested in discussing.

I'm gonna tell you upfront, I'm not gonna care if it's something like "kill all men" or "join the stats" or something. I mean I'm not in support of a targeted harassment campaign of some random man, but you'll understand that I have different standards depending on which group is making an offensive comment - the group that commits 98 percent of homicides or the group that doesn't. I'm also a white person, and I'm not going to shit my pants if a Black person says something like "white people can go die". I expect males to have the same resilience.

But well, in the end, I'll tell you that I don't nitpick. I always like to play a game where I go to the r/mtf subreddit, sort by "hot", and try to find 20 consecutive posts without some absolutely deranged shit. today I made it to the eighth post, which was:

if you don't believe me, do it yourself lol. What I post is not a nitpick, it's the average r/mtf post lmao

[trannydykes]

Y'all need to SHUT UP about "transandrophobia/transmisandry". I saw a post the other day I haven't stopped thinking about, about transmisogyny, and like most the comments were going "Isn't that just transphobia?" (Which is already wild, 'cause it isn't. Since transmisogyny is the overlap of two very real oppressions: Transphobia & Misogyny)

But one was like "Sees post abt transmisogyny, checks blog, transandrophobe. like clockwork." When literally there was no posts on OPs blog that were hateful toward transmascs/men... just posts talking abt OPs experience with transmisogyny. (even if there were it wouldn't be "transandrophobia" cuz its not real, it would just be either transphobia or bullying/harassment depending on if their transness was attacked)

If you see people talking abt women's issues and think "This means they HATE men!!" (trans or no) you need to stop an think for a moment. Women on this site can't make ANY exclusive post (Transmisogyny, Lesbianism, or just talking abt being women) without guys coming along and going "How can I make this about me?".

And I know it's mostly trans men who are suffering through dysphoria and thinking about women makes them ick. But consider for a moment that you don't need to verbalize those thoughts, especially under posts that aren't about you/your experiences.

Please refrain at least from doing it under other ppls posts, I'm begging.

OPs note: I'm not being hostile/trying to start shit. Im just upset and wanna talk abt it. I'm transmasc myself (tho not a man).

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

It took me less than two functioning braincells to realize that trans activists and radfems were literally accusing each other of the same exact things (bigotry, sexual harassment, and grooming kids), just with the targets switched around. When you see it, you can't unsee it and then the entire situation/debate just seems like a "No u!" type thing. The way the trans community treats and refers to women is repulsive, and the way that radfems treat and refer to men is repulsive. Both of these groups also try to pretend as if they're not grooming children. They're discussing all these serious issues but when you see that they're basically sticking their tongues out at each other rather than actually doing anything to solve them (other than disturbing the peace, that is), it becomes unintentionally hilarious. I'm a lesbian so I've been caught in the middle of this whole debacle and have been pressured to choose a side in the past. None of them actually care about who they both claim to defend (primarily children and homosexual people). They're both equally as stupid, and I've expressed as such. I don't think anyone of the opposite sex should enter single-sex spaces they don't belong in (nor do I think hormones and surgery make you the opposite sex), but I also don't believe in feminist fear-mongering that the second I step out of my house I'm going to get attacked for having a vagina or that a man breathing in my general direction is harassment. The sky is blue and the left eats their own.

Great blog, by the way. :) I hope you have a nice break from this hellsite LOL.

I've been saying for years that the RF part of TERF is the worst part of that acronym, and I just keep getting proven right. I'm willing to accept the radfems as allies against the trans activists, but we can never forget that they're their own brand of awful on nearly every other issue.

Thanks for the blog compliments! And I did have a pretty good time away, so mission accomplished I guess XD

[himedanshicult]

I'm going to try and explain to you, as a trans woman myself, why you're wrong about transandrophobia advocates. I've never once seen a single one of them, and I've interacted with many over a long period of time nearly every day now, claim that transmascs cannot be transmisogynyistic, and I feel you're very deliberately conflating that with "transmascs don't have structural power over transfems", which IS true. They don't have power over us. They can be transmisogynistic but that doesn't mean it's systemic on their part. If anything, we have power over them, because transmascs are constantly shut out of queer spaces, taunted, told they should all die, have jokes made about them being forcibly impregnated, and harassed in attempts to force them back into the closet because everyone thinks transitioning to "man" is a morally bankrupt political choice. When they try to complain about these things, they're told to shut up and stop deprioritizing the real victims. They're told they have to consider themselves transmisogyny exempt - which is truly, I mean truly just a euphemism for hating on them regardless of if it's /supposed/ to include cis people - but when they try to come up with their own word, that's also wrong. And everyone is just...fine with "TMEs" who buy into that nonsense practically worshipping transfems to a degree I find skin-crawling. It's a bad situation.

if it seems like I'm conflating the two, well, that's because I am. i don't think it's a meaningful difference. simply saying that transmascs are capable of prejudice is an empty admission when you follow that with "but they can hold no meaningful power over trans women nor can they benefit from or weaponize systemic transmisogyny". not even getting into how these admissions often coexist with attempts to redefine transmisogyny into a "transphobia + misogyny" that can be experienced by trans men and women alike, emptying it further of credibility. the moment you start arguing that trans men have no power in the relation, you are downplaying the violence and exploitation that trans men exact upon trans women, particularly within transgender and queer spaces (which is funnily enough, what you are trying to do in this very ask!) and at that point, you might as well be denying trans mens capability of transmisogyny wholesale. at least, it would be more open and honest about what is being accomplished.

and like girl, im not even gonna touch the rest of this ask because I'd need to write a full essay just to drive home how wrong you are, like you are fucking conflating forced impregnation of trans men with tme/tma signifiers, like think abt that for a minute. there are cities whose entire lgbt scenes consist of large numbers of trans guys, but like 1 or 2 trans women- are those cities just barren of trannies, or is something else going on here? how does the average queer space or feminist org react to a rape accusation by a trans girl against a trans guy vs the other way around? for that matter, how does the legal system react to it? how did michfest treat trans guys and how did they trans lesbians? is every trans girl who talks about their local feminist or lgbt scene embracing trans guys while shunning them just lying out their ass? more to the point, why are these men you associate with hellbent on convincing you, a trans woman, that not only do they possess no systemic power over you but that you have systemic power over them? trying to ingrain into your mind that you are by default the aggressor? like, doesn't that strike you as a little akin to male/female socialization, especially since a lot of popular bloggers in this sphere openly espouse that concept?

for fear of getting my words twisted, let me be clear that i detest transphobia against trans men, and especially the proliferation of demonization towards testosterone hrt and phalloplasty thts spread like wildfire in lgbt spaces. trans men are subjected to a lot of horrific bullshit and there are trans girls who actively participate in that. im not opposed to that oppression being given a name. but none of that justifies this outright rejection of their capacity to perpetuate societal transmisogyny to their benefit that is championed in transandrophobia spaces. that only serves to allow trans men to turn a blindside on their own ability to hurt and oppress trans women and to obfuscate their actions when they do so. there are a ton of trans guys who hate transandrophobia bloggers for precisely that reason and feel deeply uncomfortable with their oppression being used to downplay and obfuscate transmisogyny

[redheadbigshoes]

I'm so done with being calm and respectful about my anger towards those who intrude on sexual boundaries.

Every time a man makes an advance when a woman says no, or that she is a lesbian and not interested, it is an attack on her agency, on the worth of her will, and many people will just say 'its weird' and try and shrug it off, but those were precursors to some of the harassment I experienced, to unwanted physical contact by a coworker in the office I used to work in, trying to erode my boundaries and self-respect.

After I publicly transitioned to a woman when I graduated and moved to a new city for my first job, I was able to come out publicly as a lesbian after having gone through literal comphet forced relationships with men in order to get a letter from my therapist for hormones. I was happy to finally be able to say who I really was, having to just hope that everyone would be nice and accepting of my gender and sexuality since working in an office means you have to be around people you dont choose every day.

I expected my main issue to be transphobia, but I didn't understand how well I passed after just 1.5 years on hrt while closeted, and I doubly didn't expect to get the attention of my male coworkers who kept on making unwanted advances over and over despite me getting upset, disgusted, and angry at them. I told them I was a lesbian and it only increased the degree of my harassment, they wanted to wear down my self-worth and knew noone else in the office felt like standing up for me. It got to the point where I had to file HR cases against two of them. Even when I broke the woman's dress code (yes there was a dress code mandating wearing skirts and dresses, Bank of America's IT department is fucking weird) and just wore concealing jackets and facemasks (this was before the pandemic) and baggy pants they kept pestering me until I got a doctor's note to work from home.

I know some of it was definitely because I'm a trans woman too, a vulnerable target, because few of my coworkers already bothered to talk to me, and when I went to HR and other company assets for help they never took my word above others. Trans Lesbians are more at risk of sexual abuse than most people because most people don't give a fuck about us or our safety.

I just get fucking incredibly upset every time I hear people pushing lesbian's boundaries to include men because that was the precursor to some of my abuse. So anyone who thinks lesbians are 'mean' for being fucking angry and upset when people push men on us can go fuck themselves, I could literally punch every man I see in the face and it wouldn't even be a fraction of recompense for what they did to me.

Just wanted to vent this after reading about a lesbian talking about how a trans man keeps flirting with her despite her saying no and it makes me want to rip something apart

-🌻

I am so sorry about what you had to deal with. I truly hope you’re safer now.

People don’t care about women’s safety in general, so when it comes to a trans lesbian it must be much much worse.

People who try to push cis and trans men in lesbianism are probably the same ones who say transphobic shit and who don’t care about SA.

[vincent-marie]

Hot Take: "Equal Fights" Predicted Online Faketivism

In some ways "Equal Fights" hasn't aged well in its effort to teach about feminism, that the execution wasn't handled as well as it could have been & that it wound up painting the feminists as straw men stereotypes. Rumor has it that even Lauren Faust, who did storyboards on the episode, isn't a fan of it in hindsight.

However this episode feels a lot more relevant to me now in our current age of online purity culture.

We live in an age of social media where young people, who had little to no power before, now have a tool at their fingertips to signal boost for those who need help the most. Teenagers can be everyday heroes in their own right. Frankly I respect you kids for being motivated in your sense of kindness & nobility.

However the problem is that unfortunately what good that can actually be done gets drowned out by a lot of harassment & bullying in the name of social justice. Especially if these young people's sources are very dubious & self-serving.

That's basically what Femme Fatale is as a character. She's a grifter who uses a progressive movement, feminism in this case, as her means for her own gain. Namely, robbing banks.

It's understandable that every super villain has a gimmick. Two-Face has the Number 2 & duality, FF could've just been a devious collector of currency with women imprinted on them. (I myself wish they would discontinue the bulky, useless penny & bring back the Sacagawea dollar.) But beyond that, she uses it as an excuse to get out of getting arrested, to claim that what she's doing is good for society at large, & above all to manipulate & influence the young & impressionable Powerpuff Girls.

The girls, being literal children, take her words to heart & implement them in ways that do more harm than good. From bullying boys in the schoolyard to letting Femme Fatale get away with her crimes.

Reminds me an awful lot of kids & young people on Tumblr & Twitter who get riled up by the words of self-proclaimed progressives who turn out to be TERFs, grifters, or members of the Leopards Eating My Face Party. Namely, the people who use progressivism & online activism to their own end.

And it's not just the Youtubers with the large subscriber base. It's also the individuals who reblog, retweet & bully even on a small scale to make themselves look good or feel like they're making a difference. Not to mention the burner & bot accounts being used to fan the flames of discord within progressive circles.

But what I find the most telling is that FF claims to be a feminist, she collects Susan B. Anthony coins, but she doesn't even know who Susan B. even was & why she was so important to American history.

Reminds me an awful lot of certain gay or trans Youtubers who would try to have you believe that "queer" is a slur, when in reality we not only reclaimed it as an umbrella term to include bisexual, trans, intersex, asexual, etc. people, but is an important part of our very history.

The slogan chanted demanding our basic human rights:

"We're here, we're queer

Get used to it."

It makes me sick that there are multiple generations of people who don't understand our own history. That there are people within our community who would promote & capitalize on that ignorance.

That's who Femme Fatale is. Willingly ignorant herself, selfish, manipulative, & would promote such lack of values to the next generation for her own gain.

And that's why she deserves to serve time in prison, while online faketivist grifters deserve to lose followers, go broke, & disappear into obscurity so they can't do any more damage.

[rgr-pop]

I’ve been Troubled again by the haters. an ngo anarchist again said she won’t support the abortion fund because she doesn’t like socialists. she’s been going around characterizing us as like brocialists— I can’t say that this doesn’t happen even when it’s just me a cis woman, because it happens every time, but it’s just crazy how they can get away with even trying that when it’s a trans woman (which other than me it basically is—obviously). i wouldn’t think twice about it except as you know if you’ve been following along, she organizes primarily with two men who we have accused of stalking and harassing us for years (and as you recall we’re not the only ones). she’s doing this in an organization with no democratic structure for recourse in this. she’s a paid organizer with a state ngo who has taken over a local advocacy org, she’s claiming to do this to “reform the ngo from the inside.” she’s organizing with almost exclusively men who have accusations against them. and she’s spending her time discrediting local non ngo abortionist women who have made accusations against guys she’s likes.

and i want to fight back, and i want to ruin their reputation. but (affirmations) : they don’t have a reputation. they don’t have credibility. they haven’t paid for ten peoples abortions. they aren’t building anything. nobody knows them. they’re not winning! they are not fighting for life.

[trollprincess]

So I can’t block ads on YT on my Roku like I can just on my laptop, so I’ve been blocking every political ad - no matter who it’s for - for being “repetitive.”

I voted by mail, my county has my ballot, I am DONE.

Now, at this point, I am basically only getting one set of ads - from Dave McCormack, against Bob Casey. The ads boil down to two types - “Casey is for THEY/THEM, not YOU!” and “Casey is for sanctuary cities and an ‘illegal’ raped a little girl!”

Now, the second one … I don’t want to dismiss anyone who experienced child sexual assault, and that is horrific. But when you decide to target child sexual abuse by targeting *churches* who generate WAY more of it than the one or two dudes your ads mention, come back to me.

As for the first, I can help but laugh. Because the first shot is the whole “He let *biological MEN* play sports with GIRLS,” which is an annoying thing they keep doing to make it look even more salacious, but also at this point they show a basketball team where one player is taller and … MAY be trans? Who knows? I played basketball on a high school with a very good basketball player who was a cis woman who would have gotten her gender questioned *constantly* with the femininity checklist these people are using. Moose was a very friendly and kind person with lots of athletic talent who was the lesbian we all knew was gay but never talked about it because it was the 90s and you waited to not come out until you left town. But she was never the most feminine person, and if she was going to school now she’d be getting harassed within an inch of her life.

But my favorite part of the ad is when they’re like “He cares about they/them more than you!” and they show a clip of what appears to be a cis male dressed in fetish wear at what I assume is Pride smiling and dancing.

And I know there’s somebody who’s going to go, “Well, he shouldn’t be out in public like that where kids can see!” Y’all, I have a dog that hates kids and people wearing masks. You know what I don’t do? I don’t talk him for walks during Trunk Or Treat in our town. Try that, but with kids.

Anyway, I wish I could vote against McCormack again, because Jesus, what a racist hateful carpetbagging sack of crap.